Whee – Me!

Imagine my displeasure this morning when one of the first things I noticed in the New York Times was a photo of Oak Park’s own Kathy Griffin. Thankfully I had nothing in my mouth at the moment otherwise the fellow sitting at the Starbuck’s table next to me might have been wearing my breakfast. The reason for this nightmarish apparition was a review of this year’s first episode of Griffin’s reality series, “My Life on the D-List,” now beginning it’s fourth season.

That’s right – fourth season. Griffin, a gargoyle with red hair, pancake makeup and a grating voice, has made a career out of talking about herself and her brushes with celebrities, topics about as riveting as a game of Scrabble between George W. Bush and Britney Spears.

Here’s the kicker: Kathy Griffin has won an Emmy award for her show, seen (where else?) on Bravo Thursday nights. Bravo has remade itself into the channel of choice for the gay middle class. Griffin’s core market, if one is to judge by her choice of monologue topics and cutaway shots of her live audiences, is decidedly Boystown.

What in the living hell do they give Emmys out for anymore?

Griffin holds down an honored spot in one of my Excel lists entitled Life-Is-Not-Fair. Joining her on the list are such Chicago area luminaries as Jim Belushi and Richard Roeper. I read through the list whenever I begin to think that the world has some rhyme or reason. Invariably when I think such thoughts I become disappointed, discouraged and ultimately fall into a funk. If these three hyenas and others on the list can earn fabulous livings utilizing their scarcely identifiable talents, then there is no logic to be found on this hunk of rock. Life ain’t fair, baby.

Those of us who cling to the notion that the concept of fairness should hold sway are doomed to constant disappointment. So in a way, Kathy Griffin and the others do me a service.

Speaking of unfairness, the Cubs’ Alfonso Soriano suffered a cracked bone in his left hand after being hit by a pitch in last night’s game against the Braves. Dang. He’ll miss up to six weeks while his paw heals.

I should have expected at least a little bad news to come out of this dream season. Soriano’s loss probably will slow down The Century Express a bit.

This question has been on my mind the last few days as President Bush travels through Europe talking tough about Iran. Is he ramping up the rhetoric in order to help make Republican presidential candidate John McCain, a Vietnam vet and former POW, look better come November?

After all, the rap against Dem Barack Obama is that he’s inexperienced and far too conciliatory. And, of course, he’s a sleeper agent for the Islamic terrorist cabal that wants to destroy America. If we’re on the verge of war with Mahmoud Ahamadinejad this fall, the Republicans can crow that we’d be better off with McCain as Commander in Chief. It seems the GOP’s only hope.

Happy Loving Day! Didn’t know it was Loving Day, did you? Admit it, you don’t even know what Loving Day is. Today’s the 41st anniversary of the US Supreme Court decision overturning anti-miscegenation laws in 16 states. Yup, within my lifetime a significant swath of the Union held marriage and/or the sexual coupling of people from different races to be criminal acts. Yikes!

And people wonder why the Rev. Jeremiah Wright has such a chip on his shoulder.

In 1959, Mildred and Richard Loving pleaded guilty in the state of Virginia to the heinous crime of being husband and wife. She was black and he white. You’ve gotta love the statement issued by the deep-thinking Judge Leon Bazile who ordered the Lovings to leave Virginia after their guilty plea:

Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, Malay and red, and He placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with His arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that He separated the races shows that He did not intend for the races to mix.

Wow! And where do the Malays get off, having their own race?

With the ACLU behind them, the Lovings pressed their case to the nation’s highest court. In a unanimous decision, Earl Warren’s court ruled that anti-miscegenation laws were racially discriminatory and violated the due process and equal protection clauses of the 14th Amendment. For its part, Virginia argued that since both blacks and whites were equally penalized for violating the law, it couldn’t be discriminatory. Nice try.

So take a look at your friends and relatives who’ve married or live with someone outside their races and know that less than half a century ago they would have been felons.

Big Mike